I was speaking with a man at the supermarket today. He asked what I was doing here in America, and what I got up to more generally. When I told him I played the harp, he said:
‘The harp! YES! The cello of the opera!'I have no idea what that means, (as I pointed out, very firmly)* but I know that I like it.
I think that’s what I’ll tell people from now on.
Next time someone asks me whether I wished I played the piccolo, I shall laugh merrily, shimmy over their feet with my MASSIVE harp, then tap them firmly on the nose and say, 'But I do! The harp is the piccolo of the roller disco!'
And then walk away, harp in tow, with a stride far more majestic than fits the situation.
*No, I didn’t really. But can you imagine??
'The harp! YES! The cello of the opera!'
'Nono. That doesn’t mean anything. I think you’ve got what you just said mixed up with something that makes sense. Good day sir.'
End Scene
p.s. I realise I used the word firmly twice in a very short space. But sometimes you just have to do things firmly, and no other word will do.
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